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» End The Blame Game
Who do you blame if something goes wrong in your
career? Your boss or former boss? Your employer or past employer?
Colleagues, family members, or the person who recently was
hired and either took away your job or the promotion you
wanted?
How about if no one is to blame, but someone is responsible?
How about if the responsible person is you?
We are a society
of blamers. (We all do it.) And even though we criticize
others for not taking responsibility
for their careers, when it's our turn and something happens
to us, we look outward to assign blame. And who would fault
us? The job market has been tough and fear has been rampant.
We need to point a finger at someone or something, and
in many cases, the finger does not point in our direction.
I
am not saying that you should walk around with the world
on your shoulders if something in your career goes awry.
I am saying to accept what happened, learn from the experience,
forgive yourself, make a plan to refocus, and then move
on. Time will pass anyway. And how do you want to spend
your time? Mad at the world, mad at yourself, or on fire
and moving in a positive direction?
So How Do We End The
Blame Game? Follow These Steps Below:
1) Recognize
What Blame Is Costing You
Sometimes blame feels good. We like to be right and if
we are right, then another party has to be wrong. We feel
vindicated because we know who hurt us and why they are
to blame. The downside to blame is we stay stuck and stagnant
which makes us feel worse. When we are wronged, we have
a decision to make. Be right (and stuck) or be moving.
Living well is always the best revenge.
2) Recognize That You Can Stop Being A Blamer
Blaming can be just as addictive as anything else. The
adrenaline and the juice we feel makes us feel alive. But
you can stop blame if you want to. Sometimes we continue
at habits or thoughts that no longer serve us because we
are not sure who we would be without them. Trust that a
new you will emerge once you get rid of the blame. Trust
that the answers and the direction you seek are there once
the cloud of blame has been cleared.
3) Recognize That Without Responsibility There Can Be
No Forward Movement
When you accept responsibility for your career, a sense
of calm will emerge. No longer will your energies be focused
outward but inward on you. You will feel great, motivated,
and empowered. Your sense of purpose and direction will
reappear. You will enjoy being with you again.
4) Recognize That With A Plan Great Things Happens
Once you are responsible then you can be accountable.
You can plan your work, and work your plan. You can open
your calendar and put items into it again. You can take
your goals and break them into small achievable pieces.
You can look towards the future and the future will be
brighter. You can move forward and achieve results. You
can make plans and expect to reach them. You can be a person
who used to be a blamer and one that has become a goal
reaching machine.
So what do you say? You only have one
life to live so it might as well be a life you love!
Michelle Nolan |
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